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I was reading this post on Psychology for Photographers when he called me.  Again.

And I ignored the call.

Again. (In fact, I finally blocked his number).

And that’s how I knew it was time to write this post.

I met a guy at a Superbowl party this year (sigh… Broncos…) who, immediately after meeting him, I knew I’d be writing a blog post about someday.  He was a friend of the host of the party and we were still relatively new to the area, so Adrienne and I were excited to get to know some of our friend’s friends.

We exchanged the “how do you know so-and-so’s” and the “well, this game is horribly depressing’s” and things took an unfortunate turn when we reached the standard line of getting-to-know-you questioning.

“What do you do for a living?”

Apparently, “developing apps for pro photographers” sounds WAY more glamorous (and profitable) than it really is.  Because his eyes lit up.  And not in an “I’m so interested in hearing more about what you do because that sounds so cool” kind of way (it’s really not, by the way. I spend most of my time sitting in front of a computer thinking about shit like this).  It was more like “I’ve been lost in the wilderness for a year, surviving on grubs and shrubbery and hey look there’s a platter of bacon cheeseburgers!”

It was clear we had moved swiftly from, “let’s get to know each other and do some dude-style small talk” to “I’m a real estate agent and now I’m going to sell you a house right now right here on the spot seriously let’s talk about your real estate needs like how many rooms do you want and do you need a two car garage or a three car garage for all of your app developer fancy cars and I bet you’re looking for something over 3000 square feet and how about a pool your wife looks like she could use a nice relaxing pool even though you live in Colorado and it’s way too damned cold for a pool 80% of the year but pools add value to the house that I’m going to sell you right here and right now right on this spot next to the bean dip and your plate full of barbecue that’s getting cold because I won’t stop talking about the house I’m going to sell you and how amazing it’s going to be.”

And through all of this, all I found myself thinking was,“Some foreplay would be nice…”

Well, that and “man, I bet this barbecue would have been delicious if it was still warm…”

Even if we had been in the market at that time (we weren’t) and had all the money in the world to spend on a place (we didn’t), there’s not a snowball’s chance in hell I would have ever worked with that guy.  Ever.

Want to sell something?  It’s pretty simple.

Find out what someone needs or wants. Then show them how you can provide that.

And if you’d like to find out what someone needs or wants, you should probably get to know them first.

Worst case, you come away with a new friend (and still-warm barbecue).  Best case, you come away with a new friend, a few more dollars in your pocket and the knowledge that you were able to fulfill a need that your new friend had.

Bonus?  Friends refer friends to friends.

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